I used to work nightshift at Home Depot driving forklifts and unloading trucks. This all took place during the last week of my employment there. There was this jerk supervisor that worked in the plumbing department during the day that would always try to get us night shift dudes written up for dumb stuff because he was always on a power trip. I got word that he tried to have me written up for not bringing down a pallet of toilets like his rudely written note had requested. He was pissed because he had to do it himself the next morning. A few days later, there was another shitty note on my forklift to drop a pallet and I was got tired of his shit. So I went out to the garden department and grabbed a 50lb back of manure… used the stock picker (it’s a lift that takes you up to the top racks to manually pull down stuff) to go up to the pallet he wanted down and rigged it so that when he pulled it down the next morning because I “forgot” to do it again, it would tear the bag and dump shit all over the place making a big shitty dookie mess for him to clean up.

Turns out it worked better than I planned… because it dumped the shit ON him… Biff Tannen style.

That was my last night employed by the Home Depot.





Tell me your stories.

2 coworkers and myself spit in this girl's drink. She drank it. That was mean.

I stole this idiot girl's Pinkerton CD, I don't feel bad about that.

I could go for days.

Put tie wraps on people's drive shafts of their work trucks so it would make a clicking sound.

We have spray styrofoam to close up conduit. We would spray it in the bins of people's work trucks so theycouldn get to their tools.

Put double sided tape on cones during the summer. It would melt and they couldn't get their cones separated.

Smear shit on the door handles.

Cover the car in cheese

All these were pretty much done to the same guy because he was a rat and though he was a boss.

This thread would be cool if people would fucking contribute to it.

Raped a woman

Worked with a guy who might have actually been retarded. We used to call'em "Chris Enis, master if the gay penis" when we first seen him in the day. I made him snap once because I called him gay randomly.
I should feel bad for how much I/we fucked with him but fuck it.

we would open hot mustard packets and throw them like gernades through the drive thru window at this one guys car who thought he was hot shit and bossed teenagers around even though he had the same position as we did.

Originally posted by: TheOtherGodhead

I made him snap once because I called him gay randomly.

i thought you called him chris enis?

"hey gay randomly"

*dude snaps*

I worked with a gay dude who wore light khaki pants one day, and I noticed he had blood on his ass coming through the pants. Instead of pulling him aside and telling him nicely, instead I asked loudly
"Chris why is your ass bleeding" everyone turned to look at this point.

I once told a co-worker that I have a bubble around me and she was not aloud to get that close to me, because she was annoying as hell.

I let a co-worker give me a bj in the office and telling her I was really into her and we should date. I never really talked to her after she swallowed.

I did some fucked up things that I probably still shouldn't put on the internet, but Mark used to shove the president of our company's day planner up his ass and piss in our road salesman's drinks. That shit was funny.

I once came

Soda used to touch my ass when we worked together. The shitty thing is I got a boner from it.

Originally posted by: brian.

Originally posted by: TheOtherGodhead

I made him snap once because I called him gay randomly.

i thought you called him chris enis?

Seperate occasions.
That was his name that we added the clever title to at the end.
He snapped another time because I caught him picking his nose and made a stupid comment on it. He snapped like once a week.

had a girl give me head on the roof of dunkin donuts after we rode the red wing express. i think she bought me a dominos bread bowl later because i said i was hungry.

My life is filled with regrets about not doing shitty things to coworkers who deserved it.