A police officer walks into a bar.
Bartender says “what are you having?”
Officer says “get me a martini, shaken not stirred - now mix it on your knees and if you stir it or reach for that shaker I’m gonna shoot you”
Bartender says “ok calm down I’ll get you your drink please I don’t want to die” and reaches for the shaker.
The officer shoots him half a dozen times in the head with his personal customized AR. “That’s the only way I can get off!”